My son doesn’t mind a good old-fashioned time-out. In fact, he entertains himself to the point where the rest of us wish we were timed-out with him. As a result, we’ve had to get creative with our discipline techniques. Yesterday, after he lowered his shoulder and flatted his sister à la James Harrison, I told him that I was throwing away his Halloween candy. Always the skeptic, he replied, “But then you won’t be able to eat any.” Touché, young one.
This afternoon, I was on my hands and knees scrubbing floors, when I heard the kid freaking out because he couldn’t find the right color crayon. I warned him about his whining, as I do approximately 1,466 times a day, but he persisted. Then, I said something that has changed my life, and possibly America, as I well know it: I threatened that if he didn’t slow his roll, he would be scrubbing floors while I colored Elmo.
HE WAS GAME!!!!!!!
My floors are clean, the kid had fun (sucker), and I only had to reheat my coffee 3 times since this little task kept him busy for more than 7.5 minutes. Because I’m a caring, contributing citizen, concerned about the American economy, I’m willing to hire out my cleaning toddler for the reasonable price of a bottle of Pinot Grigio and a nap. If that doesn’t dig us out of this debt, I don’t know what will.
What fancy parenting tips do you have? The mom or dad with the most creative and effective idea will win an original Brady iPad Art Project.*