Some call him an old soul because of his wise eyes and affinity for classic rock. Others, namely Grandparents, call him “brilliant, advanced, perfect.” His sisters just call him silly.
My 6-year-old is definitely something special (says every mom ever), and while I agree with some of the above descriptions, another comes to mind every time he requests The Rolling Stones or yet another snack: stoner. Not trying to perpetuate any stereotypes of my pot-loving pals, but knowing them the way I do, I can’t help but see some, ahem, similarities in my Kindergartener.
1. When my son heard “Peace Frog” by The Doors for the first time, his little body immediately started to sway, as if the wind and music had seeped into his limbs, moving him involuntarily. As the song picked up momentum, so did he. Pretty soon, he was twirling all over the playroom, blissfully unaware of the shards beneath his feet and of his sister’s whining, “You smashin’ my Pwincess shoesssssss!” His throwback to 1960s oblivious undulations had me sniffing his hair and checking under his bed for a stash.
2. The kid has some sketchy friends. The other day at the bus stop, a boy with messy curls and a flannel shirt kept avoiding eye contact with me. Each time he approached my son, his hands were shoved deep into his pockets. All this to say, I’M ON TO YOU, YOU SHIFTY-EYED LITTLE PUSHER!
3. Coincidentally, it’s after spending time with the aforementioned curly-headed hustler that my son returns home with a severe case of the munchies. Fortunately he can’t reach the top shelves of our pantry yet, so my cookie stash is safe. For now.
4. He comes down with a case of the giggles over the simplest things. I mean, I share his love of watching people fall down, but there’s definitely something going on here…
5. After self-imposed quiet time, normally spent in our basement…, the 5-year-old hits us with these deep, existential questions that leave us clawing to respond with anything remotely intelligent.
If the trees reached the sky, could we climb up to the clouds?
Are there baseball games in Heaven?
Do you think our dogs talk to each other in people voices when we leave?
Remind me I thought this post was funny when my kid is 16, okay? Thanks, maaaaaaaaaaaan.
There better be baseball games in Heaven OR I AINT GOIN