I've no complaints about dedicating the majority of recent writing to my book. But I gotta say: I've missed word vomiting over here! I've been itching to get back to sharing the meaningless and embarrassing details of my life. LET'S GET STARTED! Writing a book right after the year of Too Many ... » Learn More about My First Week on NutriSystem (Also: Why I’ve Been Farting Like a Teenage Boy)
Here, have some funny served with a side of inappropriate. Because life is too short, laugh!
Ever since I can remember, I've worn my feelings on my face. I'm an expert eye roller, nose scruncher, and lip curler. If I'm feeling any type of emotion, you'll see it all up on my grill before you'll hear it in my voice. This makes it difficult for me to live life without appearing painfully ... » Learn More about How I Ruin Pictures
My Mom is not a shopper, which makes me wonder if I was switched at birth. You can imagine the teenage angst that was my Mother's refusal to shop with me. Ask your friend's mom; she loves the mall! But she would hand over her Visa, and all was forgiven. This year, though, she requested my ... » Learn More about If You Take My Mom To Target
A first true love is butterfly wings beating against the brain, clouding good judgement and all reason. An all-consuming, borderline obsession coupled with a physical ache that plagues the body. It's the kind of excitement rivaled only by a young child's on Christmas Eve. In a word, our first ... » Learn More about The New Face of Romance
Originally published in December 2015 Stomach troubles have plagued me for as long as I can recall. When I think of all the things they've ruined for me, one particular example comes to mind... My boyfriend had taken me to a romantic seafood restaurant then to see the Pittsburgh ... » Learn More about Things I’ve Learned Thanks to My First Colonoscopy