I remember the first time I saw him: I was at Barnes and Noble with a few friends, one of whom purchased the complete Elf on the Shelf package. My first thought (and probably words): “That thing is CREEPY!!” My pal swore that the little gremlin helped keep her son in line in the days leading up to Christmas. Don’t get me wrong: I’m all for exploiting holiday goodness in exchange for a squashed toddler tantrum. But I have limits. And that friggin’ elf is the limit.
I just can’t bring myself to invite that strange creature into my house. His unblinking, plastic eyes follow me, judging me, and I believe he comes alive while we’re sleeping. No? Perhaps you should check out the Child’s Play movies. Special shout-out to my aunt and uncle who used to babysit my 10-year-old self and my little brother and let us watch that horrific flick. Didn’t scar us for life or anything…
Back to the Elf.
I love elves; they’re helpers, and who doesn’t love a helper? I love the movie Elf; you will, too—check out the link for some of the funniest moments. If they don’t elicit even a giggle from you, we probably shouldn’t be friends.
Back to the Elf. Again.
We will never have one. Period. But I’m digging the premise behind it, so I’m looking into a Plan B. Reindeer on the Roof? Snowman on the Stairs? Penguin on the Potty? I can get a cute plush something-or-other and replace that satanic midget, right? (Just don’t tell him I said that; no need to upset him and then have him come seeking his revenge.)
Penguin on the Potty!!! Genius! You will make millions!
I’ll share. We’ll retire together 🙂
agree! 🙂
Thank you! We can be anti-Elf together 🙂
amen to that 🙂
You had me at “Eff the Elf!” I don’t get the fascination with this creepy little guy either. I’m glad that you made such a bold declaration. Now, I don’t have to hang my head in shame for not liking him. In fact, we could probably start a support group. Maybe we can call it “Why the Elf on the Shelf Gives Me Chest Pains!”
Love the idea of the support group! I’m in!!!!!
Love. 🙂
Thanks 😉
Yep, I’m pretty creeped out by the little elfy bugger too! Who are these people who have the time to hide the damn thing every night? I’m in on the support group!
I think that’s part of the reason why I hate the Elf. Much like Pinterest, he would make me look like a crap parent because I was definitely forget to hide his ugly ass each night and my kids would be hugely disappointed. Stupid Elf…
I LOVE that movie too–can’t wait to watch it this year. And I want to hear what you come up with as an alternative to the Elf!
I’m leaning toward the Penguin on the Potty 🙂 🙂
I am so with you on this. I thought it was brilliant when I first heard about it (although felt like my lack of awareness about the elf after 8 years raising my son was further proof I’m doing it all wrong). But then I thought, eww, now this is creepy. ELVES ARE THE NEW CLOWNS!
What I do do to get the good December behavior is set up an email account from Santa and send my 9 year old Santa-mails letting him know that flushing his veggies down the toilet was caught on tape. He doesn’t really believe anymore, but he really wants and Xbox, so he’s covering all his bases.
Becca
Santa emails?! AH-MAZING!! And you’re so right about the elves being the new clowns. I HATE clowns, and that must be why I hate those damn Elves!