Happy Wednesday, pals!
The Sadder But Wiser Girl, Sarah, was kind enough to offer up a guest post so I can dedicate my day to the Mt. Everest of laundry that has accumulated in every corner of my house. I’ll be back tomorrow, but until then, show Sarah some love!
Who are these people? They shall remain nameless (except me, I’m the one wearing the really cool sweater) but one thing I can say for sure is that they are family…
Many moons ago, before I had children, I had friends and family. I mean, I still have friends and family, I just rarely see them. This is too bad, because we’re quite interesting.
I was inspired to write this thinking of a time when my husband and I were newlyweds. Several of my female relatives and I gathered at my parent’s house when we were down visiting. We hung out and talked and laughed and had a generally great time.
Apparently this made an impression on my husband. He just couldn’t believe what he overheard as he sat in the next room with my dad. Later on as we drove home, he remarked that “There was all of this constant jabbering, and then it was like you all paused to take a breath and there was this huge whoooosh! And then the jabbering just kept going.”
I miss that.
We moved a couple of hours away from our friends and family when we got married. There were opportunities where we lived that we couldn’t get otherwise back home. Like Engineering school. And steady work.
As it is, I’m not what one would refer to as a social person. A nice way to describe me would be “socially awkward”. A more likely description would be “just plain weird”. I have a touch of social anxiety. I like people, I’m just not very good at connecting with them. I’m not good at small talk. I’m not good at, well, talking about anything that so-called “normal” people would talk about.
We’ve lived in this area going on 14 years now. Seven in the town we are currently in. In those years I have really not found people that I can connect with. I have a few friends here and there, but no one that I can relate to quite like the aforementioned people.
I haven’t read “50 Shades of Grey” or “Twilight” nor do I want to. I don’t get manicures and pedicures and blowouts every week. This seems to be what the so-called normal people around here seem to talk about. Maybe it’s me. Oh yeah, it IS me.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband, I love the fact that I can say something and he gets it and know right what I’m referring to. But lately he comes home from work every day and has so much to say. He tells me about how he solved problems and ended the world’s agricultural sprayer crisis and is having a litter built so that he can be carried around the plant like the Engineering king that he is… I feel like all I have to say is “Um, um, SuperGrover didn’t save the world again today. Caillou is still bald. My daughter pooped her pants 46 times today.” So I made that last one up, no one poops their pants THAT much, though it seems like it sometimes…
I miss having things to talk about and people to talk about them with. I miss the days when I could sit and have conversations with similarly weird people besides my husband (though believe me, we have some CLASSIC conversations). And have conversations about anything and everything at lightning speed including but not limited to things like the time when my friend thought she lost her mucus plug in the couch. Or when I accidentally tried to steal someone else’s child at Scheels. Or when my car literally fell apart in the parking lot at ISU. Yes, literally. You can’t make this stuff up!
Enter the internet. I’ve been slow to embrace all that is has to offer, but I’ve been glad that I have finally seized some of the opportunity. Since I’m not hampered by a mouth that either can’t form the right words or the brain that moves much faster than my mouth ever could around “normal” people, I can be me and it actually makes me sound kind of cool. This is because I can go back and write and then edit and rewrite everything before the rest of the world lays eyes on it. And it looks like I even know what I’m talking about, and maybe even sound like a semi-sane individual.
This makes me glad that I started blogging. So I could find friends like Stephanie who overshare and write posts about the toileting habits of husbands. Where I can write posts about peeing my pants at Wal-Mart and have it be my most popular of all time and no one bats an eyelash. Where I can connect with other people with ADD and children who are a little “off”. A place where people compliment me on what I do and cheer me on. Yes, I feel right at home here in the blogging world. Where I’m free to be weird and free to be me. It’s ok, they know me here.
I still miss hanging out with my similarly wired peeps in person on a regular basis, but I’m glad blogging came along so I don’t go totally crazy in between visits.
Sarah Almond roams the earth in search of dark chocolate and caffeinated beverages, but can also be found tap tap tapping at her keyboard writing the wildly unpopular blog The Sadder But Wiser Girl. Read all about her adventures in motherhood and ADD at http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com
Sarah, you said it perfectly and I do love being able to be just me with you and so many others, too in the blogging world!! 🙂
I felt a bit “rambly” when I wrote this. I’m glad it came out so that it conveyed what I was thinking and feeling! Thanks!
I love having found the blogging world too. Where else can you vent and rant and have no one interrupt you? Not in my house, that’s for sure!
Oh true, I never thought about that. I can’t even talk on the phone anymore!
I looooove you, you weirdo. So much of what you wrote could have been pulled out of my brain. We live so far away from friends and family. I was really lonely before I started blogging. Great job on this post, Sadder Sarah.
Oh and what’s UP with Caillou never growing any f#cking hair? He’s FOUR and each year he grows some more. So why not grow some hair? (hate that kid)
There is an EXTREMELY funny thread about Caillou online somewhere, because I finally decided to look up why the heck he was bald. I was laughing my butt off. I’ll see if I can find it. I mentioned Caillou in a comment on Parenting, Illustrated With Crappy Pictures and oh boy were there some funny opinions!
I am also very uncomfortable in social situations. So glad it didn’t rub off on my kids but I like blogging for that very reason. I can be funny and enlightening and just sparkling with personality (okay, I realize I just took that way too far) but from the comfort of my home. No eye contact, no fidgeting, no sweaty palms and all of that. And had it not been for blogging, I never would have met YOU and I’m so glad I did!!
Likewise! 😀
You’re not missing anything NOT reading ’50 Shades of Meh’ Trust me! And the ‘normal’ people who tell you otherwise…need to raise their standards. (Phew! So glad I got that off my chest.) Anyhoo…I’m not a mama yet, but I can say that the community I’ve found in the blogging world is the best kind of ‘normal’…my kind. Great post and thanks for sharing.
I’ve read several parodies of it online, and some excerpts because I seriously didn’t know what it was (PORN! It’s PORN! And badly written porn at that from what I’ve seen).
We’re glad we found you too Sarah!!
Thanks Melissa! You already know how much I enjoy your blog! 🙂
I am so glad you found blogging, too. And congrats on your guest post!
Thanks! I can share my crazy with everyone this way… it’s all good!
Oh. My. GAWD. You said this so, so well.
I miss having something to contribute to the nightly conversation around here. I used to come home from work and have about 50 funny stories to share with my husband. Now all I do is get out my iPhone and show him all of the cool videos of our child. 😛
Blogging has certainly opened a lot of door for me, too! And it helped me find you!!!
xo
Aw thanks! I’m glad it’s not just me. Now, if only we ladies could get together in real life! 🙂
I have made so many amazing friends through blogging—and maybe I sound weird for saying this, but I like my bloggy buddies more than my friends that live here now–in the blogosphere I can be myself and say ANYTHING, and no one judges. And Sarah, you are one of the funniest people I know! I love our late night conversation on Facebook where we are comfortable talking about all kinds of weird!! This was a great post and a wonderful way of readers to get to know you……and by the way, I had a sweater almost IDENTICAL to the one you are wearing!!!
We blogging ladies have awesome fashion sense! Even in the 90s…
The word weird when applied to some of the stuff we talk about is an understatement! We can discuss this further when we are on our private train when we are rich and famous, drinking our wine and eating our chocolate.
I have to go read that Walmart post!!!
It’s a classic. I was all proud of myself for getting the dog food onto the cart, into my car, and into my house this month without peeing my pants. My husband gave me a weird look when I was being all happy about that. Men don’t get that stuff.
I know what you mean Sarah, it is really hard to make new friends, especially when your old friends are so great and it seems like nothing on earth can be as great as they are. But don’t be afraid, the world is full of nice people in search for new friends, just like you:)
This is exactly the reason I started blogging! I love it and wouldn’t have it any other way! Glad you got to share!
I didn’t expect the friendships that have come from blogging. I just wanted to write. The connections with fellow bloggers, AND with readers have been such a wonderful surprise.
I know what you mean about being with those people who have known you forever. Whenever I get to go home for a visit, my soul is renewed. It fills me up.
You are not socially awkward Sarah and the proof is the fact that you have friends. Maybe you haven’t met the right people yet, just have a little patience and try to give a chance to new people. You may turn out to be pretty amazed by the results.
Oh I am just so sad that you haven’t been able to really connect with anyone!!! You don’t give yourself enough credit! There are NO normal people!!! There are people that want to be your friend…you just haven’t found them yet…for whatever reason. BUT I am so glad you have a place here to be yourself and to be encouraged and loved!! 🙂