A couple of months ago, I wrote a post about why I will never homeschool my kids. From the backlash that resulted, you woulda thought I punched a puppy. Goodness are some people touchy, also terrible readers. In the very beginning of my piece, I plainly stated that I have nothing against homeschooling, but it just isn’t for me. After being battered with comments like, “you shouldn’t have had kids if you don’t love them enough to educate them” and “You’re obviously just a really lazy parent,” I found a silver lining, and her name was Meredith.
(Side note: we didn’t know it at the time, but turns out Meredith and I are co-authors of the new hilarity I Just Want to Be Alone–you pre-ordered your copy HERE right?!)
Aaaaanyway…
Meredith, unlike me, has every intention of homeschooling her two young children, and she said as much when she commented on my article. Except she didn’t insult me and we didn’t argue. We simply agreed to disagree and then wished each other well.
I know, right?!
The interaction with Meredith was so refreshing that when the lovely Erin of Social Butterfly Mom approached me to write something for her Validate Thy Neighbor series, I knew I wanted to again tackle the topic of homeschooling. Except this time, I wanted to write about it from Meredith’s perspective, and it just so happens that she jumped on the validation bandwagon and is writing about homeschooling from my perspective. You can read her post HERE.
Intelligent dialogue tastes so good, doesn’t it?
So just for today, I am pro-homeschooling and here is why:
1. Outside influences are crazy scary, and if I have the opportunity to control and limit them on my young children, I am going to. They will be grown and away from the nest soon enough; I’m going to protect them under my wing as long as I can.
2. While it may be a daunting task, being solely responsible for my kids’ formal education is also very empowering. Anyone who knows me knows I could use a little Algebra refresher, and the idea of learning together is pretty cool. Not to mention how experiencing a few “a ha!” moments together can cement an infallible bond between me and my minis.
3. Despite the assumption that social interaction is limited, homeschooled students are, in fact, part of their community’s and home school district’s clubs, athletic teams, and other intramural programs. In addition to participating in organized activities, homeschoolers have the ability to set their own schedule which means we can make the time to volunteer at church, our local Boys and Girls Club, and other charities. The idea that generosity and charity could become a weekly hands-on lesson is valuable beyond any formal education.
4. Access to homeschooling materials and tools has never been easier or more abundant: virtual classrooms, ready-made curriculum, support staff just to name a few. The variety and availability are extensive and convenient. So while some say they can’t do it, it’s certainly not for lack of resources.
5. Speaking of which, my husband and I are living, breathing resources. We are both certified, licensed educators. In fact, I hold teaching certifications in four different states. I have been educating other kids for years now; why not extend my expertise to my own children?
At the end of the day, every parent knows that no one will ever love our kiddos the way we do. Not their grandparents, not their school teachers, not their friends. No one sees kids’ vulnerabilities, strengths, or silly sides like parents do. Our children love and trust us unequivocally, even though sometimes it may not seem like it. The ability to maintain that kind of connection with them through their most formidable years is so important, and in a day and age where anything can (and does…) happen, why not keep them by our side just a little while longer?
If you want to participate in Erin’s Validate Thy Neighbor series, contact her at: thesocialbutterflymom@gmail.
I don’t want to homeschool my children either. I don’t have an issue with it for those who choose to do it, but I have never thought it was right for me or my children. I work from home, I also don’t think this is the right choice for everyone anymore than working outside the home is the right choice for each family. I don’t understand why so many moms seem to think they need to criticize other mothers for making choices different from their own??
I won’t homeschool my kids. Doing some preschool-type stuff with the 2 year old is enough to make me pull my hair out. I think that being a high school PUBLIC school teacher keeps me willing to send my kids out. But, I do understand that some really do want to keep their children at home and that’s FINE. Everyone knows their kids better than the random strangers who try to be all judge-y judge-y about their parenting choices.
Thanks for taking a moment to look at it from the opposite side. It’s like you’re an English teacher or something who knows the skill of argumentation. 🙂
I don’t get home schoolers either…unless you are forced to live in a crappy neighborhood. (We have some up and coming neighborhoods in St. Louis, but the schools stink.) We moved to a good district for the kids. I don’t always like the school’s spin on education, but over all the boys are getting way more knowledge than I could share. Plus my oldest is in a kick butt,nationally ranked marching band. What home schooler could say that?
Oh, and can we give a shout out to diversity?
I get the homeschoolers, Denise; I just don’t wish to be one. After writing this piece from a different perspective, there actually were various aspects that appealed to me. What do you mean, shout-out to diversity? Like, homeschooled students wouldn’t be exposed to diverse backgrounds? Speaking slowly, I’m pregnant and tired 🙂
I would love to homeschool but my husband is not on board but he and I agreed on which school districts we want our kids to go to and our only option is to move in with my parents this fall so our oldest can attend a good well balanced school system (plus we will have our choice of 4 different bussed high schools and we can transport to any other school on the state.
Ashli, if you don’t mind me asking, whereabouts are you and yours from?
I read both posts- so refreshing to see people with different opinions able to see the other persons viewpoint. The blogosphere is so full of commenters lambasting each other for not seeing through their parenting glasses that they can’t see how valueable they are to one another! Loved it.
Isn’t it, though? Both refreshing and full of A-holes?! 🙂
So happy to be linked with you! I love that you can make a different choice and still throw support mine!
Ditto, lady! xo
Aw!! Imagine THAT!! You guys conversed normally and listened to each other’s points. WHO KNEW??!! Great post and how nice to come back and do it from this point of view! I could never homeschool (it would kill me…like kill me dead) but to each her own! Everyone knows what works best for their own family. More power to the homeschoolers! I bow down! –Lisa
Lisa- I’m glad that you liked these posts. Stephanie and Meredith did a great job! Steph, I think you make a good point: that you and your husband’s are both certified, well trained educators. Those are the people who make sense to homeschool their kids. But then I feel like a lot of them end up sending them to public schools. What do you think?
Honestly, I think it’s because so many of us are burned out. Stakes are so high today in public schools and if you’re doing your job the way you’re supposed to, it is absolutely exhausting. Also, public school teachers don’t make a lot of money; my family is proof that we need both incomes to pay the mortgage. My husband and I work full-time (I’m at least at home), but where is the time to teach our kiddos? I hope that doesn’t sound like an excuse; rather, a legitimate time constraint!
“Like kill me dead” is basically how I feel about it, too, Lisa!!!!
Seems really rude that people would attack you over something that is such a personal choice! I am a special ed teacher but I would still consider homeschooling my own kids. Like all other types of education, I feel like it is really up to every family to decide what is best for their children. Some kids thrive in a regular public school. Some kids do better in a private school, charter school, therapeutic school, special school, or whatever. And some do best if they can learn at home with their families, in their own style. It is silly to tell someone that they are lazy or unloving if they choose not to homeschool!
I honestly think people look for posts that stir up a bit of controversy and just let loose. It’s much easier to be an asshole when you’re not looking the other person in the face!
Love your ability to agree to disagree- I can usually do that as long as things don’t get ugly and personal- kudos to you both!
I’m with you, Anita! As long as things can remain respectful, I’m game. Otherwise, my claws come out. Probably not my best feature… 😉
I thought your original post was great. I don’t understand why you can’t honestly have an opinion that is different and not be okay with that. I hate that as a society we have gone to My Opinion is the ONLY one that is right. Whatever. You have every right to do what you feel is best for your family, not that you need my permission to do it.
Thanks so much, J! I’m really digging Erin’s Validate Thy Neighbor series. Very cool way of agreeing to disagree.
I love that there are so many educational options for our kids. My oldest attends public school, and his sister will, too, but I can certainly support the decision of families that choose to homeschool, and see value in it. I would even consider it if our particular situation were different.
My annoyance isn’t with differing opinions, but with people who make choices and then spend so much time defending those choices. Who cares what other people think? Those that defend their choices the loudest always strike me as unsure of themselves. Validate Your Neighbor is a wonderful exercise, and only those who are confident in their lifestyle choices could possibly participate.
I TOTALLY agree with you. The quiet, confident ones are the most secure. And even the loud mouth semi-confident ones like me know what we’re doing every once in a while! I like that you appreciate the series and complimented me all in one sentence. Well done. 😉