Bunker Reports: Day 1 of COVID-19 Quarantine
On Friday, March 13th (I see you, Universe), we learned schools would close across the state of Pennsylvania for the next two weeks as to control the spread of COVID-19. This means all three children and #HusbandWTF will be roaming around here as I continue to work from home. It’s fine.
Over the weekend, I put together about a week’s worth of lesson plans and activities for my kindergartner, third grader, and fourth grader. In the middle of my planning, I felt a surge of energy, of inspiration!, which is strange because I know I’m not cut out for homeschooling.
At any rate, I told myself, This is your time to shine!! Husband and I are teachers–we’ve got this!
Please note each child completed their work in less than an hour.
There are so many more hours in the day…
It’s fine.
I live with really lovely people and I enjoy them, though at times, when they are under the same roof, it is hard to focus. As a virtual educator, a lot of my day is spent communicating with others in writing or via phone and meetings, thus I need quiet. I need concentration. I need to be able to yell obscenities while on mute with an annoying parent. These things weren’t necessarily possible today, but it’s fine. I’m adjusting.
I’ll tell you who’s not adjusting: the husband. For whatever adorably optimistic reason, I thought he of all people would make a concerted effort to leave me the hell alone so I could do my job.
via GIPHY
Know what I learned today? The man is physically incapable of reading anything silently to himself. After almost fourteen years of marriage, I’ve never really noticed–or at least I didn’t care–that he literally narrates his entire life:
“Now where did I put that paper? Where oh where is that piece of paper??”
“You know what? I think I’ll eat a snack!”
“What should I type on this line?” *peers squinty-eyed at computer screen* “Whose address do they want? Mine? MINE? MY PLACE OF BUSINESS?”
*farts, blames it on the dog, runs away*
When I asked him to kindly shut his face hole, he seemed sincerely surprised that his running commentary on hamburger buns hadn’t been appreciated. I knew I’d finally gotten through to him when he exited the room, shoulders slumped, with a dejected, “You’re not very nice when you’re working.”
CORRECT.
Fortunately, the weather was semi-nice (read: they didn’t freeze) so the kids were able to play outside. They only interrupted me when it was really important, like to tattle on each other or ask for another snack. I think it’s supposed to rain tomorrow so I don’t have high hopes for avoiding a noon cocktail.
Nevertheless, bunker report for today? Overall, not too shabby. Adhering to the increasingly restrictive guidelines set forth by the CDC will not be easy. As of now, groups of 10 or more shouldn’t be together, non-essential businesses are closed, and even outdoor playdates are supposed to be monitored to ensure kids remain six-feet apart. Yeah, it’s tough. It’s inconvenient. I may lock my husband out of the house. BUT I figure if our country just needs us to stay in the house and not go to war or anything, this is totally doable.
Remind me I said that when we’re still going to school in July.
At the end of every quarantined day, I have to appreciate how fortunate we are in the midst of all this chaos. My children aren’t immunocompromised like my pal’s four-year-old who lives with these precautions every.single.day as she battles Leukemia. #HusbandWTF and I are able to be home right now, negating the need for childcare and with no interruption to our income. Sure, I’ll be twitching and curled into the fetal position soon, but still: we are lucky.
Oh, if you’re still here: I came across these fun resources that I thought I’d share because I don’t know if you heard me earlier, but I THINK IT’S SUPPOSED TO RAIN TOMORROW…
OMG it’s like I’m one of those organized, Pinterest-y moms. LOL.
Watch live feed from the Pittsburgh Zoo’s penguin and cheetah cams!
Cincinnati one-upped us and is hosting Home Safaris at 3pm on Facebook Live. Calm down, Karen. If you don’t have Facebook or are strangling your husband at 3pm, the zoo is posting everything on its website and YouTube so no one has to miss Fiona the Hippo.
Featured Image: The Mother Octopus (loooooove her)
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