My Kid is Funnier Than Your Kid

I had a whole post ready about how I was going to beg my husband to impregnate me, but then my son went and said some of the funniest things and I just have to share! Plus, we’re a little pressed for time today; we’re traveling to a friend’s house for the ultimate play date: five kids, three adults, one ornery cat.


When my daughter wakes up, still confined to her crib, she begins babbling to herself. She calls out all of the things she sees in her room: Sockies! Purple walls! Ella’s shoes!

Normally, she’ll call for my son who then goes in to greet her. This morning, he climbed in her bed and started quizzing her on her shapes. He contorted his little fingers into circles, squares, etc. Much to his dismay, his sister kept naming letters instead of shapes…

Boy: What shape is this?

Girl: E!

Boy: ELLA! E is NOT a shape!

Girl: O!

Boy: Okay, I’ll give you a shape that starts with the letter ‘O.’ This is an oval.

Girl: Oooooooooo

Me: Dude, how did YOU know oval started with the letter O?

Without missing a beat and looking at me like I’m a moron: I’m very smart. Didn’t you know?


After school yesterday…

Boy: So many girls in my class love Justin Beaver.

Me: Justin Beaver, huh? Yeah, a lot of girls love him.

Boy: I DON’T! I think beavers are ugly.

Me: Good. Let’s keep it that way, shall we?

I plan to remind him for his aversion to the Beaver right around his 16th birthday…


For more funnies from the kiddos, check out the Conversations with Toddlers page, and feel free to add your own!

Happy Friday, pals!

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  1. motherhoodisanart says:

    haha!! My daughter is a big Justin Bieber fan and she also pronounces it Justin Beaver! Since my 2 year old thinks his big sister is the coolest he has also become a big fan as well! He points to the computer and chants, “Beaver, Beaver, Beaver” until I finally relent and play him “Baby, Baby” for the 400th million time! He loves the Beaver!

  2. nothingbythebook says:

    I can’t believe you didn’t know he was very smart. What sort of mother are you? ;P

    • Apparently I’m the kind of mother who can’t even recognize the difference between a toddler fingers square and rectangle. I was scolded shortly after the “O” incident…

  3. Dani Ryan says:

    I can’t wait until we get to the talking phase. The stuff that’s going to come out of this kid’s mouth is going to crack my ass up. I love this stuff!

  4. Meredith says:

    I want you for a mom! You are so funny and OF COURSE you are so witty smart!

  5. Chris Carter says:

    I just love the Beaver interaction. SO funny!!!! :)

  6. I love this! My 6 year old constantly makes references to”meat”. I like meat. I’m going to eat my meat. Mommy get my eat. I love to eat meat. In a few years, when he figures out why his dad and I snigger like we are 12, I’m going to start using every one of those phrases. Daily.

    • We seriously need to pull out these gems when the kids are bringing their first girl/boyfriends home, or in public at least. “MOMMY LOVES HER MEAT!!!” “DO YOU STILL THINK BEAVERS ARE UGLY?!” Awesome.

  7. Dying laughing! My Brady also likes to tell me how smart he is. It gets much worse when they can read, trust me.

  8. Jill Pinnella Corso says:

    Your kid is hilarious! I’m always having to tell people I’m smart, also.

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