Eff You, Daylight Savings Time

The second Sunday of March.

Every second Sunday of March.

We set our clocks ahead by an hour and “lose” some shut-eye. My kids find it a little difficult to cope, and their normal sleeping routine takes a temporary hit. We readjust, enjoy the longer days, and eventually fall back into step with the rest of America (not including the brilliant people in Arizona and Hawaii).

Then November rolls around. Oh, November, you bittersweet temptress. With your fall foliage comes my birthday (read: cake) and Thanksgiving (read: sweet potatoes). But alas, you aren’t all sugary goodness; in fact, you are the antithesis of all things good when, on your first Sunday, we set our clocks back by one hour, supposedly gaining sleep, when in reality all you have done is begun another cycle of disruption.

November, I know it’s not your fault, it’s that bitch Daylight Savings, but how does it make you feel to know that the world becomes a darker place on your watch? Because of you, my daughter has been awakening at 5:15 in the morning. I had hopes she would improve, maybe adjust to the change; but every day after her 5:15 wake-up call, she has crawled into my bed at 6:22 am on the nose, poked me in the boob, and announced, “I done seepin’!” I am not amused. Neither is my boob.

This isn’t horrible. It could be worse. She could be up all hours of the night poking things, but listen to me carefully: I love sleep. I need sleep. And, November Daylight Savings Time? I’m sure you’re not aware that I wake up forty six times in the middle of the night because a dog sneezed or the weight of my growing belly put my hip to sleep or I suddenly realize I’m committing a huge pregnancy no-no and snoozing on my back. I jolt upright so quickly I scare myself. And then I have to venture to the bathroom a handful of times, as is to be expected in my state. I get it. You don’t know these things, so how could you possibly understand what you’re doing to me. That’s why I just wanted to make it clear: the nighttime sleep ain’t happening for me, so the early morning sleep must.

Oh! Have I mentioned that my adorable little ball of daughter is also boycotting her naps these days? Turns out, she can karate chop the child safety mechanism right off of her door knob, giving herself free reign of the house. And then this happens:

Sure, she’s cute, but do you want her climbing into your bed ALL BY HERSELF before the sun is up? I didn’t think so.

You see, what we have is a simple failure to communicate. Sweet November Daylight Savings Time, if you could just go ahead and assure me that your cooler temperatures and Tryptophan turkey will get my gal back to normal, we could be friends again. I will celebrate you with fall walks, kids’ art work featuring your colorful leaves, and maybe I’ll even share my birthday cake. Let’s be real, I doubt that last one will happen, but if you don’t make it so my kid starts sleeping her normal 12 hour nights again, I will cut you. CUT YOU.

Or, I’ll deliver this right to your doorstep.

SleepyElla

This is what happens when a child wakes too early, doesn’t nap, and then has no energy left in the evening. She falls asleep right after dinner and you can only imagine what kind of early morning that makes.

CUT YOU.




Comments

  1. Sounds like her and J would get along well – her sleeping has been horrible lately. Except she is up during the nightime hours as well :-/ And naps have been 80% gone from here for at least a year now. Hope she starts sleeping better for you again :)
    Rebecca R recently posted…Jewelry In Candles Giveaway!!!!My Profile

  2. I LOVE how you ended this post! It made me laugh out loud! Hope the sleep situation gets better. :)
    Shay recently posted…Bird PoemMy Profile

  3. I have totally forgotten how Daylight Savings screws up a kids sleeping schedule until I read this! Hey, it STILL screws up MY sleeping pattern!!!
    Menopausal Mother recently posted…The Holiday From HellMy Profile

  4. LOL! I can relate to this post in SO many ways!! I am absolutely exhausted right now. I was before the time change, but this has magnified it times about a thousand!!
    Carrie recently posted…Top 5 Saturday Laughs 11-9-2013My Profile

  5. Oh, I remember the days when DST would screw with my perfect little schedule … toddlers don’t do flexible very well–especially not with the sleeping. I will say that once they hit the tween status, DST was somewhat (only a little) enjoyable because it lends to a more chill evening. When it’s dark out, they feel a natural inclination to “wind down.” As a matter of fact, my 14 yr old went to bed at 8:30 on Saturday because it felt “so late” since it had been dark for so long.

    Hopefully your cutie pie adjusts soon!!
    Real Life Parenting recently posted…My cup runneth overMy Profile

  6. Ugh. After my first experience with “fall back” after our daughter was born, I have been on top of DLS like you can”t imagine. I start preparing almost a month in advance. And last week was a breeze. But then I woke up at 5:30 am on Saturday morning with cramps and PMS, and my daughter decided to get up for the day as well. And she hasn’t napped in MONTHS. So ya, I get it. It sucks. Here’s hoping things level out for you soon, my friend!!! xo
    Dani Ryan recently posted…I bet you’ve never loved anyone enough to do thisMy Profile

  7. You know what I hate about Daylight Savings? The single people that brag about the extra sleep they get. Those people suck.

    Also, your daughter is adorable. If she’s smart enough to get through the safety latch on the door, maybe you can teach her how to read a clock?!
    another jennifer recently posted…How Will You React When You’re Concerned for Your Safety?My Profile

    • We have a little digital clock in her room; she’s supposed to wait until she sees the morning 7 (we hide the minutes so she just sees the hour). Not working so much. But I hear there are little kid clocks that turn different colors. Now that she could do! Thanks!

  8. So sorry you aren’t getting your rest. That sucks out loud for you!! If it’s any consolation (it won’t be) I finally have my youngest to the point where sleeping in is mandatory. Of course, after 4 months of getting up at 4am for work, my body won’t sleep past 5am on Saturday. As a matter of fact, it’s 7pm on Friday night and I’m falling asleep while typing this!
    Mom Rants and Comfy Pants recently posted…Time to Step UpMy Profile

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  1. […] may recall Miss Thang has learned to remove the safety latch from her bedroom door, which allows her to roam free like a wild buffalo on the great plains. This […]

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